Caring for People who Cut Themselves (Help for Self-Injury)

Years ago I was responsible for training volunteer telephone counselors for an international Christian ministry. We were getting 150 calls a day from adults and teenagers who were in crisis, hurting in some other way, or needing prayer. Some of the young people who called were struggling with cutting themselves. This frightened some of our…

Soul Talk: Inviting God into your Conversations

We long for soul talk with a friend that helps us experience God’s presence. You can facilitate these life-giving spiritual conversations. I’ve been doing this for many years, not only in my ministry as a Psychologist and Spiritual Director, but also in my marriage and friendships. I love to elevate conversations into experiences of soul…

Love Languages Test

This Love Languages Test is a free, simple tool we designed based on the concepts in Gary Chapman’s best-selling book, Love Languages. It’s meant to be completed by you and your spouse, family member, or friend and then discussed in order to help you better understand one another’s preferred styles for giving and receiving care. The…

Speak the Truth in Love

Conflict. It’s inevitable in marriage and our other close relationships. When you love someone you’ll have misunderstandings, disagreements, and hurt feelings in that relationship. This is true for all kinds of people, including pastors and other Christian leaders and caregivers. As it relates to conflict the mistake that we’re most prone to make is to…

Negative Emotions

Negative emotions. We all have them. We all have struggled with how to deal with emotions like worry, anger, depression, shame, ambition, lust, or jealousy — even a psychologist like me who has devoted 24 years to helping people overcome emotional problems. Of course, having an emotion isn’t a problem — it’s normal. But how…