By Bill Gaultiere © 2012

I’d like to share with you the benediction I wrote to go with my sermon on Matthew 6:25-34, “Be God’s Wildflower — Be Worry Free.” A benediction is a blessing from God that is pronounced by one person over another.

This benediction is inspired by Jesus’ words: “Why do you worry about how you look? See how the wildflowers grow. They do not strive or strain to impress. They bloom where they are planted because God has clothed them in his splendor. If that is how God clothes the grass will he not much more clothe you?” (Matthew 6:28-30, PAR).

As Jesus spoke these words he was probably pointing out bright red poppies on the hills of Galilee (like those pictured above). What a beautiful scene! The Lord shines his glory on us when we take our place in his kingdom of the heavens.

Receive God’s Blessing

May this benediction help you to smile a prayer of thanks to the Prince of Peace.

Hear the blessing of the Lord Jesus Christ:

“Do not worry. You are God’s precious wildflower.”

May you receive God’s words like rain

And sink your roots into the the Father’s love.

May you soak up the sunshine of Jesus’ smile

As you dance with joy in Spirit breezes.

“Do not worry. You are God’s precious wildflower.”

So bloom where you are planted for the glory of the Lord.

More Soul Shepherding

“Be a Wildflower for God (You’re Not Inadequate)” tells the story of a time I was feeling inadequate until God showed me a single wildflower, seeming lost in a field of color. I experienced a little bit of heaven in the words he whispered to my heart. I appreciated anew that my sufficiency is not in my achievements but in the beholding the Lord’s smile.

“Soul Shepherding is for you and your ministry.” Contact us if we can help you.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ SoulShepherding.org

Jesus' hand of mercy is open to you now!

A Soul Shepherding Moment

By Bill Gaultiere © 2012

I often talk with pastors and other servants of the Lord who judge themselves harshly. I tell them, “Don’t feel bad. Feel sad.”

God never wants you to linger with bad feelings about yourself — even if you sin. This may be a new thought for you. It may sound like I’m contradicting the teaching of the Bible. If so then you to take to heart the Apostle Paul’s teaching in 2 Corinthians 7:8-13 where he contrasts “worldly sorrow” and “godly sorrow.” The Apostle Paul was the greatest of all psychologists, second only to Jesus Christ himself.

Why it’s Bad to Feel Bad

Nothing good comes from shame. When we condemn ourselves for our sins, failings, or struggles it pulls us down, down, down into depression and isolation, further and further away from the mercy of Christ and the care of people. Shame sucks the joy of the Lord out of our lives, suffocating us and rendering us incapable of loving God or other people. Shame is worldly sorrow.

It’s necessary that we feel convicted by our sin, realizing that we’ve separated ourselves from God and been unloving to him or another person (including our own self). But how do we respond to the awareness of our shortcomings?

Don’t slide down into guilt, judgment, condemnation, shame, and self-hatred! God doesn’t want that for you. Instead, God would have us respond to our awareness of sin with sadness. ”I’m disappointed that I didn’t express love for God… I wish I would’ve willed good for that person and been kind… I am sad that I reacted with such anger… I missed out on appreciating the blessing of Christ with me and sharing that…”

Why it’s Good to Feel Sad

It’s helpful when conviction of sin leads us to feel sad because godly sorrow inspires us to reach out for Christ’s hand of mercy that will pull us back up to our feet. Godly sorrow produces a longing for the righteousness that comes from God. Godly sorrow leads to salvation, being reconciled to Christ and helped to become more like him. Godly sorrow  becomes empathy for God and the people we’ve hurt and when we understand others we are in position to love them.

“There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1). Believe it.  Take it to heart. Be sad about the sinful part of you that hurts God, others, and yourself. Plan now that the next time you fail you will not wallow in self-recrimination, but will immediately cry out, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me!” (Luke 18:13, 38).

More Soul Shepherding

In “The Curb of Shame” I explain the wisdom in Martin Luther’s controversial exhortation to “Sin boldly!”

Check out our article archive “Overcoming Problems” and find the articles under the categories “Depression” and “Low Self-Esteem.”

Soul Shepherding is for you and your ministry. We’re always happy for you to share our resources with the people you minister to. If you have a question or concern or if you’d like us to speak to your small group or church community contact us anytime. Soul Shepherding is a 501c3 nonprofit ministry supported by tax-deductible donations.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ SoulShepherding.org

Jesus wants to embrace you!

A Soul Shepherding Moment

By Bill Gaultiere © 2012

This morning I opened up my Psalms prayerbook and read, “May the Lord answer you when you are in distress… May he send you help from the sanctuary” (Psalm 20:1-2).

3,000 years ago with the help of the Holy Spirit the Psalmist was interceding for our comfort. Believing that inspires me to pray. Instead of trying to make prayer happen with my words and energies I let the Scripture and the Spirit carry me to the throne of grace. “We don’t know what we ought to pray for but the Spirit himself intercedes for us…” (Romans 8:26).

What comfort do you need today? Is someone in your circle hurting?

In our family we are very sad and in need of comfort. We lost Kristi’s dad to a heart attack yesterday. Our loss is heaven’s gain as he’s in glory with Jesus. We’re happy for him, but we will so miss having him part of the family.

There’s been a lot of tears and more to come. Also lots of hugs, listening, memories, and prayers. How do you let go of husband? Father? Grandpa? Friend? Yesterday he had so much life. Today he’s gone, but actually more alive than ever. So many hopes that can’t be fulfilled, yet he has realized the greatest hope of all in the arms of Jesus.

In the Arms of Jesus

In the arms of Jesus. That’s the ultimate source of comfort. That’s the only way to let go of a loved one — embrace the Loved One. The Lord Jesus Christ who conquered sin and death embraces us now here on earth even as he is embracing Kristi’s dad in heaven.

In the arms of Jesus. That’s the ultimate source of hope. Really we’re all just pilgrims passing through this earth. We try not to think about how brief our lives are. We forget that “the life that is truly life” is not only in heaven waiting for us, but it is in increasing measure available for us to “take hold” of right now with Jesus in his kingdom of the heavens (1 Timothy 6:19).

In the arms of Jesus. That’s where we are as we embrace one another. We are the body of Christ. We are Christ’s ambassadors (2 Corinthians 5:20).

In the arms of Jesus. That’s where the Psalmist led me this morning. I hope it’s where you are now. Who do you know who needs to find comfort and hope in the arms of Jesus? It’s by being in the arms of Jesus yourself that you can offer the help to others that is needed. (He has BIG arms to hold lots of people!)

O Jesus, there is no better place to be than in your arms — we rest in your embrace. We release our loved ones into your arms — they rest in your embrace. Yes, Lord, in your arms heaven and earth aren’t so far apart. Amen.

More Soul Shepherding

“Trusting God in Sadness” tells the story of how God helped me at a time when I was depressed.

Soul Shepherding is for you and your ministry. If we can help you find God’s comfort contact us. We want to help you live in such a way that God’s peace and grace live in you and overflow from you to others in need.

Dr’s Bill & Kristi Gaultiere ~ SoulShepherding.org

By Bill Gaultiere © 2011

“Days pass, years vanish, and we walk sightless among miracles.”

These words of warning from a Jewish sabbath prayer are true of most of us most of the time. How easily we become preoccupied with work or burdened with worry. We neglect to pay attention to the beauty and goodness of God all around us.

We miss out on God’s miracles.

Come to Jesus

But Jesus still opens the eyes of the blind. How? With his touch. With the most wonderful invitation, “Come to me… and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:28-30).

Rest for the soul. Peace. It’s in the embrace of Jesus. It’s in the breath of the Spirit. It’s for now. It’s for you. It’s for me.

Do it. Pause. Take a deep breath. Meditate on a Scripture like, ‘There remains a sabbath rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Make every effort to enter that rest” (Hebrews 4:9-11, NIV 1984).

With the Word of God in your heart look up to heaven and say a prayer…

You’ll experience miracles. Your heart will open to the beauty of flowers, laughter, a cup of hot tea, a good book, a nap, a relaxed conversation. You’ll experience Jesus Christ and be filled with his love, ready to overflow to the people near you.

More Soul Shepherding

“Six Unhurried Words” will help you to rest in God.

For those who live in OC we’re offering a seminar and a morning retreat as special opportunities to rest in God and his Word. Check out our calendar.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ SoulShepherding.org

By Bill Gaultiere © 2011

Conflict. It’s inevitable in our close relationships. When you love someone you’ll have misunderstandings, disagreements, and hurts with that person. This is true even for pastors and other Christian leaders and caregivers.

As it relates to conflict the mistake that we’re most prone to make is to avoid or deny it. We walk on egg shells not to upset others. We ignore the elephant in the room. We cover our hurt feelings with a smile or we distract ourselves with busyness. We stuff our anger, becoming depressed or resentful and eventually, perhaps, we lose our temper and speak harshly, causing more hurt to others and ourselves.

But the Bible teaches us to “Speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15). God does this with us. And as we grow to rely on God’s love and truth it empowers us also to be honest with others, speaking the truth to them calmly and graciously, without fearing their anger or getting angry ourselves.

Ask for Empathy

In counseling we show people how to resolve their conflicts by saying things like: “When you do X I feel Y.” For instance, a wife might say to her busy husband: “When you take cell phones calls during dinner I feel unimportant. It’s disappointing to have our time together interrupted. I feel set aside, like I don’t matter to you.”

Notice that in saying, “I feel…” you’re not speaking about your perceptions of other people, but your emotions. Except for a brief reference to what happened (what he or she did to trigger your emotion) you’re not focusing on the other person’s behavior; instead you’re asking him or her to understand your personal experience.

Being honest in a gentle way invites empathy, builds trust, and facilitates reconciling after a conflict. It’s not just a skill to learn—it’s the character of Christ to develop.

More Soul Shepherding

Take our short survey, “Do you Over-react?”

“Jesus Set Boundaries.” Learn from Jesus how to say no and to speak the truth in love.

Soul Shepherding is a 501c3 nonprofit ministry of counseling and spiritual mentoring for pastors and other Christian leaders and caregivers.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org

Do you ever become jealous? Or get competitive? Most people do.

These are problems of insecurity that come from trying to find our value in the things we have, the way we look, or what we do. This is the way of our culture which says, “Blessed are the rich, the good looking, and the successful because they have what the best that the world has to offer.”

Who is Really Well Off?

But Jesus says, “Blessed are the poor and the shy because the kingdom of the heavens is open to them.” But don’t stop there. He would also say, “Blessed are the rich, the good looking, and the successful because the kingdom of the heavens is open to them.” In other words, the great opportunity of anyone’s life is to be alive in God’s kingdom—whatever circumstance they might find themselves in. (See Matthew 5:3-10 and Luke 6:20-23).

If you’re rejoicing in the smile of Christ the King then you won’t be overcome by jealousy or selfish ambition when you see someone who looks to be fortunate. Instead you’ll want to share the blessings of Christ that you’re enjoying. You’ll naturally and routinely “Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15).

Be a Friend of the Bridegroom

John the Baptist’s disciples became jealous and competitive when they saw that Jesus’ disciples were baptizing more people than them. John replied along these lines, “Jesus is the Bridegroom and the people are his bride so of course they want to go to him! I am the friend of the Bridegroom and it’s my great joy to stand at his side, give him praise, and encourage everyone to go to him. Jesus must increase and I must decrease!” (John 3:29-30, paraphrase).

Oh to be a friend of the Bridegroom! There is no greater joy than to draw people closer to Jesus! That’s why we need to eliminate selfish ambition and the insecurity that underlies it by discovering the treasure of God’s kingdom.

A Breath Prayer Exercise

Here’s a Breath Prayer to help us cultivate the faith, humility, and generosity of John the Baptist: “More of Jesus… Less of me” (based on John 3:30).

As you breathe in appreciate Jesus… As you breathe out let go of the sin, striving, stress, or whatever it is that distracts you from Jesus…

It helps to name whatever it is in your life that crowds out Jesus, even to imagine that struggle as you pray: “More of Jesus… Less of me…”

Breathing in, “More of Jesus…” Breathing out, “Less of my striving…” (or worrying or trying to please people or…)

More Soul Shepherding

Here are some of wonderful promises of the blessing for those who open their heart to God and find their true Identity in Christ.

Here are my favorite Breath Prayers from the Bible. So easy to memorize and carry with you as you go about your day. So delightful and transformational to pray from your heart.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org

“It’s no sweat!” we say when something is easy for us. What if we lived life without sweating? Without straining, hurrying, or worrying?

That’s how Adam and Eve lived in the Garden of Eden—till they separated themselves from God. Ever since people have been working by the sweat of their brow. But we misunderstand this and think that work is the curse. No! We were created by God to rule and reign with him (Genesis 1:28). Work is not the curse—sweat work is the curse.

How do you do your Work?

I talk with a lot of pastors and many other kinds of ministry leaders from presidents to parents and so many of them tend to live by the sweat of their brow. They’re straining to serve God, help people, and accomplish their work for God. Often they’re rushing from thing to thing, running late.

I understand. Most of my life that’s how I lived—till I discovered Jesus’ way.

How about you? Are “sweating it out” as you do your work and face the challenges of your life?

Jesus’ “No Sweat” Way

Jesus redeemed us form the curse, setting us free from sin and sweat too. Often sin and sweat go together. Sweat work—continually straining to do more, faster, and better—is likely to be a manifestation of our pride, relying on ourselves rather than the Spirit of Christ with us. It’s said, “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop.” Well, it’s just as likely to be true that “Busy hands are the devil’s workshop.”

The issue is how we do our work—how we serve customers, teach students, parent our kids, clean our house, run errands, and minister to the people in our church. Jesus invites us to do our work in his “easy yoke” (Matthew 11:30). He did his work with a relaxed attitude and a smile on his face—that’s Jesus’ way.

How about stepping into Jesus’ easy yoke today as you do your work? Remember, ”The joy of the Lord is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:10).

More Soul Shepherding

Recently a Soul Shepherding reader wrote: “I was highly encouraged as I read this blog on hurry. The connection between my own hurried agenda and the sin of pride is an excellent reminder to live in the present moment and celebrate the moments we have been given as a gift from God. This was a great reminder to live in the present grace of God.” If you go to our page on “Overcoming Problems” you’ll find this and other similar articles under the category “Hurry Sickness.”

In my book, “You Can Live in Jesus’ Easy Yoke” you’ll find uncommon insights on dealing with stress, creative and refreshing ways of praying Scripture, and an opening to walk the path of life with the Prince of Peace.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org

There’s one thing you don’t hear on 9-11 and it’s the most important thing. Until you trust these words you’re not in a position of strength to minister God’s comfort to the grieving and his justice to the oppressed and endangered.

“This world is a perfectly safe place to be… as long as you’re in the kingdom of God.”

Huh? If ever there was a day that we’re reminded that we’re not safe it’s 9-11. There are terrorists in our world! There are untold thousands of people in America and around the world who are grieving because a loved one was killed by a terrorist.

The Kingdom of God

Yes, these are frightening and sad realities in our world today. But Dallas Willard’s words remind us of a greater reality, which Jesus was always talking about and demonstrating: the kingdom of God.

God’s kingdom is not just a far off and a way later for when we die—it is present wherever Jesus Christ is Lord (Luke 17:21). He is the King and he’s alive and acting in grace and power with his hosts of angel armies all around you right now.

If we learn to live in terms of the reality of the kingdom of the heavens in our midst rather than the visible world we live in then we will have peace—even in stress, even if we’re endangered, even if we’re harmed or killed.

The Psalmist’s “No Fear” Prayer

3,000 years ago the Psalmist was in a time of darkness, surrounded by enemies, and dealing with bad news. He knew the Lord as his ever-present refuge and fortress. He anticipated the coming of the Christ and his kingdom and he prayed for himself and us, that we would not be shaken, but would be like the gracious and compassionate and righteous man: “He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord” (Psalm 112:7).

I find it helpful to pray the Psalms to Jesus, the one who fulfilled all the prophecies and all the righteousness of the Psalms. So I pray that verse this way:

• “Jesus, I hold you in my heart… I have no fear.”

As a Breath Prayer, I breathe in with a whisper: “Jesus, I hold you in my heart…” And I breathe out with a whisper, “I have no fear.” Inhaling the peace of Christ… Exhaling fear.

I also use it in intercession for others:

• “Jesus, may ______ hold you in her heart… May she have no fear.”

More Soul Shepherding

Psalm 91 is a psalm I turn to often for myself and others when feelings of fear come. Here’s little prayer that distills this beloved Psalm: In Jesus’ Shadow.

“Smile in your Storm” explains how Jesus remained at peace when he and his disciples were in a boat on the Sea of Galilee and being pounded by a terrible storm that threatened their lives.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org

Soul Shepherding is a 501c3 nonprofit corporation supported by tax deductible donations

What if you never hurried? Could you live that way?

Lots of work to do? No hurry. Late for an appointment? No hurry. Sightseeing on vacation? No hurry. House needs to be clean and company is coming over soon? No hurry. Climbing the corporate ladder? No hurry. Dealing with a difficult person? No hurry. Can’t seem to get into a conversation? No hurry. Seeking help for emotional pain? No hurry. Behind in reading through your One Year Bible? No hurry.

“If you don’t hurry then you’ll miss out.” That’s the fear. It’s half true. You can do more if you hurry. But you won’t enjoy the experience very much and you won’t be keeping in step with Spirit of God.

Jesus was never in a hurry—except to go the cross for us (Mark 10:32, Luke 19:28). The Father never is in a hurry either—except to embrace us (Luke 15:20).

So why do we hurry? Because we’re running our lives, trying to get what we want, be important, or take control. If we truly put God in charge of our life then we won’t hurry.

A Breath Prayer

In an hurried Sabbath day I was inspired by Jesus’ “easy yoke” invitation in Matthew 11 to compose this little prayer: “In Christ be easy… Don’t hurry.”

You might try it as a Breath Prayer:

• Breathe in the peace and grace of Christ: “In Christ be easy…”

• Breathe out your pressure to do more: “Don’t hurry.”

You’ll find this Breath Prayer especially helpful if you pray it as you anticipate a situation that tempts you to hurry. Then pray it in that situation while resisting hurry, submitting yourself to the Lord and resting in his love.

More Soul Shepherding

“Six Unhurried Words” tells the story of how God inspired my little prayer.

“Breath Prayers from the Bible” introduces you to this simple, life transforming way of prayer. Everyday over a dozen people read this article.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org

Soul Shepherding is a 501c3 nonprofit corporation supported by tax deductible donations

When was the last time you sat by the ocean, a lake, or a stream? It’s a great place to meet God and breathe in deep as you appreciate his beauty and goodness that restores your soul.

Kristi and will be leading 30 missionaries in a 3-day retreat at the ocean at a private hotel in Mexico. What joy it brings us to assist Jesus’ ministry of renewing people who work so hard to share his gospel!

Our personal retreats and the ones like this that we lead for others are all about intimacy with Jesus. Through Scripture meditation, soul talk, solitude, and listening prayer we’ll be drawing closer to our Lord. In so doing we’re helping to prevent missionary burnout which is so common. Did you know that the average pastor quits after five years of ministry? The stress becomes too much.

Perhaps you can relate even if you’re not a ministry leader? We all have stress and need to be able to say with David, “He restores my soul” (Psalm 23:3).

Try this Little, Refreshing Prayer

Psalm 42 is one of my favorite soul restoring prayers. I especially have benefited from using it by a body of water. Do you know this Psalm? One of the lines is: “Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me” (verse 7).

Years ago I paraphrased this verse:

The Deep calls to my deep

Wave after wave washes

Over me… In me… Through me…

I invite you to take a breather now…

Imagine yourself before the ocean of God’s love and pray Psalm 42:7. Try to be like a seashell in which the ocean so lives in your soul that you keep echoing with the waves of God’s love!

More Soul Shepherding

“Waves of Love” paraphrases all of Psalm 42—it is one of my prayer poems that people appreciate the most. It’s especially helpful when you’re going through distress or God seems distant.

The 3-day retreat we are doing for the Mexican missionaries and their spouses is free for them. They’ve never experienced anything like this! We are able to do this, along with low cost counseling for pastors, because of our ministry partners. Perhaps you’d like to invest in the counseling and care of pastors and missionaries? Here’s how you can make a tax-deductible donation to Soul Shepherding.

Do you live in Orange County, CA? We invite you to join us for “Thirst,” a new ministry we’re offering.

Bill Gaultiere, Ph.D. & Kristi Gaultiere, Psy.D. ~ http://www.soulshepherding.org